If you’re ever tempted to steal electronics from a department store, the one device you probably never want to hide up your butt is a GPS — you’ll never get away with it!
Luckily for the security team at Kohl’s in South Strabane Township, Pa., things didn’t go quite as far as activating the suspect’s internal Global Positioning System receiver!
Police said Michael Millern, 36, of Pittsburgh, positioned the GPS in his rectum — and also placed a number of other electronic devices inside a purse belonging to Alyssa R. Zataweski, 35, also of Pittsburgh.
With their booty nestled in handbag and… booty, the pair attempted to leave the store, but were stopped by security after passing the registers.
The dirty duo were charged with theft and conspiracy.
There’s no word on whether Millern passed the alleged spoils of his labor.