Dog-loving pet owner Jessica Alba got sneak-attacked by a raging nutjob cat-lover who’d read that the star would never own a pussycat — and may I (proudly) note I have NOT stooped to meee-OW-ing some dreadful double entendre headline like: “Jessica slammed as P*SSY-HATER!”
So slap your OWN head on this bizarre tale of adorable Alba, dining with pals at an LA eatery, suddenly mega-shocked when a wacko female feline-lover stormed right in her face and cursed her for … dissing CATS!
“I knew I’d run into you someday,” howled Looney Lady. “How can anyone NOT LIKE CATS?!”
Reported My SpyWitness: “Truly crazed, the woman raged non-stop at shell-shocked Jessica — acting like she might attack physically!
“As diners freaked, staffers finally yanked the ranting bitch away — and tossed her out like something the cat dragged in!” SOURPUSS!