In a staggering sexist assault, Princess of Our Hearts Kate Middleton was attacked in worldwide headlines during a visit to India with hubby Prince William for the unspeakable CRIME of not polishing her li’l piggies!
Visiting the hallowed Gandhi Smriti Museum — where one must trod unshod — Kate doffed her designer pumps and revealed … OMG! Mahatma GAG ME! … she’d rocked out on the royal tour wearing NO nail polish!
You’ve read the shocked headlines/brainless buzz, now hear my scoop: IT’S ALL WILLS’ FAULT!
Reported My Royal Spy, Lord Knows: “William absolutely can’t stand her wearing nail polish! Even neutral, barely there pale shades crinkle his hoity-toity nose. So poor Kate got blasted for nude nails — but here’s what NO ONE knew: She’d sneaked a tiny bottle of polish onto their plane, hoping to paint pinkies & toes en route. But when William glimpsed the dastardly bottle, he blasted, ‘NO! Eeeww! You don’t need that! You’ll stink up the plane! Get rid of it!’” (Try KISSIN’ them piggies, Prince!) … And how was YOUR week?