JOHN WATERS NOT DEAD!
Acclaimed filmmaker cult icon JOHN WATERS is DEAD – but is he? He’s NOT, The ENQUIRER happily reports.
Social media erupts after a report surfaced online saying John Waters was dead, The Baltimore Sun said.
Trying to make a name for themselves (and evidently succeeding) so-called news org National Report published a would-be obit for the self-proclaimed King of Sleaze with the header: "Acclaimed Cult Filmmaker, John Waters … Drops Dead at 67!"
The report said he was found dead -- apparently of natural causes in his Baltimore home amidst his vast treasure trove of America's trashiest and most iconoclastic collectibles including paintings by serial killer John Wayne Gacy and rare back issues of The NATIONAL ENQUIRER.
The rumored death immediately ignited the Twistterverse, social media and random Facebook bulletins and "id-jits" began circulating the report.
One Waters acolyte Tweeted: "I woke up and John Waters is dead. I may have shed a tear or two and I will mourn now. and watch cry baby on repeat."
But Waters, says he's very much alive and well -- thank you very much.
John is not only alive, he's in New York City en route to perform his spoken word show, "This Filthy World" in Brussels.
"From beyond the grave and back I will confirm this is a hoax," Waters affirmed a non-premature burial via e-mail.