‘N SYNC HUNK ATTACKS VILLAIN & SAVES DAMSEL IN DISTRESS

VIRGIN POWER!

A creep attacking a shrieking girl learned that painful lesson when the celibate ‘N SYNC stud Justin Timberlake — bursting with the strength that comes from constantly resisting a Britney Spears bootie call — jumped the sucker and DOWNED his butt! Justin and three buddies were exiting the Hollywood club Joseph’s Cafe when they heard a male-female verbal battle coming from a dark corner of the parking lot. Justin ran over — just in time to see the guy attack the screaming girl and start beating her viciously. “Hey,” yelled Justin, “that’s no way to treat a girl!” Sneered the creep, “Mind your own business!” But El-Jerko changed his tune FAST when Justin raced in and slammed him to the ground! The guy whined “I quit . . . I quit!” as Justin’s buddies yelled for the club’s security guards. They hauled the pathetic coward away while the girl sobbed to Justin, “Thank you . . . thank you!” (Hey, . . . thank Britney, babe!)