IN a desperate effort to save his most meaningful relation­ship, “Dancing with the Stars” favorite J.R. MARTINEZ turned to Dr. Phil McGraw – but even that was not enough!

War hero Martinez and his long­time girlfriend Diana Gonzalez- Jones had a baby, Lauryn Anabelle, in May 2012. But the unmarried cou­ple shocked pals when they abruptly ended their romance right after the new year.

“It’s not what Diana wanted and she is heartbroken,” said a source close to the Iraq War veteran, who was severely burned in action. “J.R. has had a hard time trusting anyone after his military tour.

“He wanted to make Diana happy, but he’s still dealing emotionally with what happened to him overseas. He told her it would be best if they broke up because he can’t commit to mar­riage.”

Reluctant to leave her baby daddy, Diana, 31, was delighted when he agreed to go on Dr. Phil’s show this past April.

On the gabfest, the 30-year-old hero, who required 34 surgeries over 10 years due to his horrific war wounds, told the TV therapist: “I love Diana, and I love my daughter…but my issues of trust def­initely limit what we can be right now. Diana is ready to take that next step, which is marriage. Deep down, I want that too. I can’t get over that hurdle.”

J.R. admits that he fears people like him only be­cause of his fame – and that insecurity spilled over into his relationship with Diana.

Sadly, even Dr. Phil’s expert relationship skills couldn’t heal the rift.

“J.R. says Diana is a wonderful woman,” noted the source. “He will always love her.”