SHEEN: THE ART OF WAR & THE CRAZED BLOOD DANCE OF THE MALIBU MARKETING MANIAC
CHARLIE SHEEN's torrential barrage of hate fueled venom unleashed in streaming tirade as he skewers Warners/ CBS execs, costar Jon Cryer, producer nemesis Chuck Lorre as he responds vehemently in his Jack Kerouac -inspired beat poet mania to his firing from Three and a Half Men for not only "moral turpitude" but defiance of his criminality clause.
Venting twenty-four hours after he had was axed from mega-million dollar gig on the hit sitcom for ostensibly a breach of the criminality clause which may lead law enforcement authorities to probe his purchase and dispensation of illicit cocaine, Sheen ripped another Tiger Blood ™ fueled profane tirade.
"Good evening. What occurred yesterday was completely and entirely illegal," he opened with. "Unconscionable. And to quote my lawyer really (exceremental) (exceremental) (excremental), suck suck.
"The decision to choose the enemy is generally thought of as quote 'a chaotic and random event fueled by the circumstance of injustice but paralleled by the finite rate of purpose' end quote." He quoted from Lao Tzu's classic masterpiece The Art of War.
"Now that I have your lazy f(racking) attention world, sit back and rejoice. For the Malibu Messiah, the Condor of Calabasas, the f(rack)ing warlock of the jealous face that is before you.
"Undigested hummus trading real estate for this fire dance.
"I beg you all to stay glued for this raving wise, Gibson shredding napalm poet before you. Alone and unshackled as the desperate cries of the soon forgotten echo freely in my lair.
"Beware I told all, yet but beware clearly I told no one. Oh how they once begged to attend my perfect banquet in the nude, now they just beg for the keys to my gold."
Ginsberg's Howl, it ain't.