BRITNEY’S DIP IN THE POOL TURNS TOTALLY TOXIC

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EVERYONE OUT OF THE POOL … NOW!! Who knew pregnant pop tart BRITNEY SPEARS was a ticking time bomb programmed to explode when she waddled to the pool after gobbling early brunch with hubby KEVIN “The Impregnator”FEDERLINE at ritzy Ritz-Carlton Hotel in Marina del Rey? Bikini-ed Brit smiled at pool-side gawkers, proudly promenading her belly-bump — not to mention other swell bumps swelling with mommy-hood — before slipping into the water aboard an air mattress.

But after 15 minutes of bob-bob-bobbing, the singer’s tummy suddenly turned … TOXIC! (Note: If you experience discomfort during this item, place head between knees — but do NOT stop reading.) Queasy after undulating atop the H2O, Britney felt a wave of nausea, ditched her float and splashed desperately toward the pool steps when … HUR-R-R-R-LLL! … she up-chucked what she’d munched at brunch, spewing barf as swimmers shrieked and parents hustled kiddies from the water! OOPS!… Morning sickness!

Brit turned beet-red and fled as pool attendants rushed to net the floating mess. (Bet it turns up on eBarf … er, eBay!) Britney’s morning dip in the pool turns totally ‘toxic